How to set your Boundaries (so you don’t lose yourself)
2 Min Read
Table of Contents
Are you a people pleaser?
The root of boundary issues
The impact of poor boundaries on the individual
How to set healthy boundaries
The journey of self-respect
One last thing…
Are you a People Pleaser?
Whenever I found myself trying to please everyone around me, I would get a deep sensation in my chest.
I could advocate for others, stand up at rallies, and even perform in front of audiences, yet when it came to setting boundaries for myself, I was at a loss.
This internal conflict isn't unique—many of us struggle with balancing the expectations of others while neglecting our own needs.
Setting boundaries can make or break us, and our relationships. It is crucial to understand them.
Stop and Ask yourself!
“How often do you say "yes" to others, even when it means saying "no" to yourself?”
The root cause
of
Boundary Issues
For much of my life, I believed that as long as people liked me, I would be fine.
This belief was ingrained in me from childhood when compliance and agreeableness were conditions to belong.
The unspoken rule was simple: as long as I played my part and didn't ruffle any feathers, I would be accepted.
But this way of living came at a cost—I lost touch with my authentic self.
After years of adjusting, I found myself burned out and disconnected.
I had built a life that looked perfect from the outside, but inside, I was miserable.
It wasn't until I began setting boundaries that I started to reclaim my identity.
The personal impact
of
Not Setting Boundaries
Not setting boundaries in your personal life can affect your mental, emotional, and physical well-being.
The consequences are far-reaching, often leading to:
Conflict and Dissatisfaction
Studies show that 60% of personal relationships experience significant conflict due to a lack of boundaries (Journal of Social and Personal Relationships).
Isolation or Enmeshment
Without boundaries, you may become overly involved in others' lives, neglecting your own needs.
Underachievement
As long as you’re pleasing others instead of listening to your purpose in life, you will not be as successful as you could be.
Lack of passion
Putting others and their needs first, means you don’t listen to what you would like to achieve for yourself.
Stunted Self-Growth
The inability to set boundaries can hinder personal growth and prevent the development of healthier, more authentic relationships.
Reduce self-confidence and self-love
Putting others first might look noble, but in the end, you pay a price. You give yourself a signal that you are less important than others.
(The American Psychological Association) reports that 75% of adults experience moderate to high levels of stress, with 1 in 3 suffering from extreme stress.
A significant factor contributing to this stress is the failure to establish boundaries, leading to overcommitment and burnout.
Time to learn…
How-to Set
Healthy Boundaries
Why not download the image and pin it somewhere to remind yourself?
The journey
of
Self-respect and Self-love
Setting boundaries is a lifelong journey that requires practice, practice, and more practice.
As you start to assert your needs and protect your energy, you'll find that your relationships become more balanced and fulfilling.
Setting boundaries is essential for staying true to yourself.
It allows you to live authentically, prioritize your well-being, and build meaningful connections.
You’ll find yourself living more and more from the heart.
Remember, your energy is a privilege, not a right. By respecting your own boundaries, you invite others to respect them too.
One last thing…
1. Learn more about boundaries and download the free exercise.
2. Learn more about burnout and try my free burnout assesment tool.
3. Sign up to my newsletter which you recieve on the first of every month.
4. Follow me on socials where I post helpful content
Consider sharing this blog with others so they can benefit too!